The Defibrillator Toaster
My mom would be so annoyed… every morning I would run into the kitchen screaming “WE’RE LOSING THEM!!! BEEP BEEP BEEPBEEPBEEP!”
“DON’T YOU DIE ON ME, DAMNIT!!! NURSE, WE NEED 12 CC’S OF CREAM CHEESE, STAT!!!”
He’s bread, Jim.
Time of deliciousness: 7:15 A.M
If we don’t restart his heart , he’s toast!
JESUS CRUST.
JAM IT!
“Daddy’s in a butter place now, kids.”
I WASN’T EVEN GOING TO REBLOG UNTIL I SAW THE SHIT TON OF PUNS
HES BREAD JIM
JESUS CRUST
I just did this. Legit.
the fuck
Clearly this is black magic at work here
been folding my shirts like this for so long that it feels weird to do it any other way
WHAT THE SHIT
MY GOD I NEEDED THIS SO MUCH
“I can’t look at the stars; they make me wonder where you are…”
The Maned Wolf (Chrysocyon brachyurus) isn’t actually a wolf, (or a fox, wolf, coyote, dog or jackal) but rather a distant canid, close to foxes. Its believed that its the only survivor of the late Pleistocene extinction. It is found in the grass lands of South America.
F U C K Bi Tc He S Ge Tm O Ne Y
“Love yourself, accept yourself, forgive yourself and be good to youself.”
Leo F. Buscaglia (via onlinecounsellingcollege)
*finishes 3 hour long movie*
who am i
I want to be one so very, very badly
except it really is. jarvis IS that suit. jarvis inhabits it like it’s his own body. he is literally wrapping his body around tony to protect him and wow yeah
Robert Downey, Jr. consoles a young boy in tears because Iron Man isn’t in his costume.
… I don’t know who looks more distraught: Downey or the kid
